The Rant: Fourth of July

So I didn't recap my Fourth of July weekend yesterday. Why? Because well I was recovering quite honestly. While it was one of the best celebrations I've had in quite awhile, the youth ass-hats never seize to amaze me like I've stated before. On Friday, the hubs and I headed out to the festival that's set up right by my house. AND I vowed that I would ride the ferris wheel. This is a big effing deal guys. I'm terrified of these things. I was scarred for life when I was little because of my cousin rocking it back and forth making me think I was going to fall out of the damn thing.

I made that thing my bitch. I conquered my ferris wheel fear! Miracles can happen.

Maybe consuming this funnel cake clouded my thought process prior to going on that wheel of death. Look at this deep-fried pile of wonderful topped with powdered sugar. It was a big "eff you" to my MyFitnessPal app.

The food was beyond amazing and watching the herds of people in all of their patriotic garb was priceless. It was a contest of "how can I be both patriotic AND wear the least amount of clothing as possible?" It was the best entertainment and it was the best quality time we've had in awhile.

It's been years since I've been to a festival like this so I pretty much felt like an overgrown child. I begged the hubs to win me a huge stuffed panda but he would have had to cough up his effing life savings to get one. This is another reason why it sucks to have kids. You know you wouldn't be leaving that place without the kid throwing a damn fit if they didn't get that stuffed animal....hell I was even close to doing so. Damn festivals and their money traps. After that we saw Transformers (which would have been enjoyed more so without sound) yikes that script.

Saturday was spent watching OITNB. Yep, the whole day. Moving on...Sunday was the Fourth of July parade and the fireworks...because it obviously makes sense to do that stuff AFTER the actual holiday. Fricken moron city. I must say, after skipping out on the parade for so many years, the kids were flippin' adorable and the whole ordeal made me feel like a kid again. Also, the bestie and I shared these awesome sugar cookies that were meant for the little kids...we're little kids...at heart..

This dude in stilts also walked over this annoying high waisted-shorts wearing pre-teen and it pretty much made my weekend. Her scream almost topped the sirens going off in the parade. The guy is pretty much my hero.